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Discovering character voices through porn. Are you really complaining? (I so need to get back to Merlin BB now...)

Title: Marking Territory
Author: Zinnith
Pairing: Kirk/McCoy with background Spock/Uhura and everyone/chair
Rating: R/NC-17
Wordcount: ~1100
Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: For [livejournal.com profile] st_xi_kink, the prompt But how 'bout everyone's had sex in the chair... except for Kirk, and he's pouty. First in my mind's Spock/Uhura, but I was thinking the rest of the crew, too. Bonus if someone makes Jim's dream finally, FINALLY come true. I could not resist. Unbeta'd PWP character study.

Summary: "If anyone should get to have sex in the command chair, it should be me."



Marking Territory

"It's not fair. I'm the Captain of this ship!"

In hindsight, it might not have been the best opening. Jim hasn't even closed his mouth before the long-suffering raised eyebrow of infinite pissiness makes an appearence.

"Whatever it is, I don't want to know," Bones says and goes back to whatever he's doing (probably something boring, from the look of it).

Jim plops down in the chair in front of Bones' desk, sprawling out in the way he knows annoys the doctor to no end. He doesn't care. The world is extremely unfair, and it's very important that Bones is informed of this fact.

"If anyone should get to have sex in the command chair, it should be me," Jim states.

Bones doesn't even look up from his data pad. "What part of 'I don't want to know' didn't you understand?"

"It was bad enough with Spock and Uhura. I swear, Bones, if I ever have to hear Spock attempt to talk dirty again I will shoot myself in the head."

This time, Bones does look up. "You watched?" The eyebrow makes a reappearence. "Jim, I should be shocked. Then again, this is you, so I guess I'm not."

"It wasn't like I planned it," Jim defends himself. "They surprised me and I had to hide behind a console and, well, not really the best time to announce my presence if you know what I mean." Besides, it had been kind of hot and Uhura apparently has talents in other fields that xeno-linguistics. It's a pity he's had to give up on ever getting into her pants, but Jim is pretty fond of his bits, and he's also convinced that Uhura could castrate him with a look.

Bones shakes his head and, yep, there's the patented eyeroll, and then he focuses his attention back to the datapad. "I'm not listening to you anymore. Go away, I'm busy."

"I think Sulu spends more time in my chair than he does in his actual bed," Jim says conversationally.

"Go. Away."

"And as if that wasn't enough. Yesterday, there was Chekov. Chekov, Bones. He's twelve. He's not even shaving. You need to tell your nurses to stop seducing kids! I don't think that's even legal."

The datapad hits the desk with a thunk. "Dammit, Jim, I'm busy! I don't have time to listen to you whine about things that are none of your business."

"I'm not whining!" He totally isn't. James T. Kirk is far too cool to whine. "It's not fair, that's all."

Bones sighs again. "Unbelievable," he mutters. Then he stands up, walks around the desk, and grabs Jim's arm, pulling him from the chair. "Come here."

"What? Stop that, where are we going?" Jim has to struggle to keep up as Bones drags him out of his office and towards the turbolift.

"You will clearly not leave me alone until you've had this unhealty obsession of yours satisfied, so what I'm going to do is to indulge your perverted fantasies in the hopes of getting a moment or two of peace."

Jim can't keep from grinning. "Sweet."

Bones just ignores him, cursing all the way to the bridge about how he never should've joined the Starfleet and how he needs new friends to replace the insane ones he already has.

Everything's calm on the bridge and the early evening shift doesn't have much to do. Jim and Bones' entrance makes a bit of a stir, especially as Bones still has Jim's arm in a firm grip.

"Everybody out!" Bones orders, propelling Jim towards the command chair.

The crewmembers give them both incredulous looks and Jim absolutely does not blush. "Um," he says, and then finds his Captain voice. "You heard the man!"

After another moment of surprise, quickly transforming into amusement, they leave, exchanging knowing glances as they go. Jim hides a wince. Sulu will tease him for years. And Spock will do that thing where you know he disapproves but is too Vulcan to say anything. Not that Spock has any say in the matter whatsoever, since he was the one who started it. Actually, it's all Spock's fault, and Jim cannot be blamed for anything that's about to happen.

"Will you sit down?" Bones says impatiently. "I don't have all day."

Captain or not, there are some orders Jim is only too happy to obey. He sits down in the command chair, undoing his pants while giving Bones his very best leer. He's not completely sure what Bones is planning, but soon finds out as the doctor steps up behind him, leans over the back of the chair and sticks his hand down the front of Jim's pants.

It's not like they're exclusive or anything, but sometimes there is alcohol and things happen and their friendship has remained intact through the years despite the occasional booty call.

Bones is also exceptionally good with his hands, knows just how to touch and tease to drive Jim crazy and yeah, this is everything he thought it would be and better. The chair is humming slightly, the windshield is black, painted with stars, going on forever and ever and Bones' breath is hot against Jim's neck while his fingers are speeding up, going faster and doing clever twisty things that feels amazing.

Jim leans back into Bones' shoulder, hears the muttered "...infuriating, irresponsible..." and just has to turn his head and press his lips against Bones' throat, feel his pulse through the thin skin there, and when he comes it's with a soft exhalation as the stars burst behind his eyelids.

When Jim opens his eyes again, Bones is wiping his fingers on a tissue. "Happy now?" he asks. "Can I get back to work?"

No, Jim decides. That's not going to happen. Bones is slightly flushed, clearly turned on against his will, and Jim wants to make the most out of this moment. "Your turn," he says. "You don't want to be the only one on the ship who hasn't had a go in the chair, do you?"

It takes a moment, but Jim can actually see the moment when Bones' resolve breaks and he gives in, when his expression softens and he sits down in the command chair with a sigh. "All right, just make it quick. Some of us have important things to do."

Jim grins and kneels between Bones' spread legs. 'Quick' is not on his agenda for today.

-fin-

(no subject)

Date: 2009-05-16 02:08 pm (UTC)
ext_18579: WATCHMEN! (Default)
From: [identity profile] sinstralpride.livejournal.com
WIN

Please tell me that you're going to write more in this verse? Please? *offers internet* I would do a great many things to see more of this beautifully exasperated Bones and slightly petulant but ever-so-grateful Jim. ^___^

Especially with stuff like this:

Bones is also exceptionally good with his hands, knows just how to touch and tease to drive Jim crazy and yeah, this is everything he thought it would be and better. The chair is humming slightly, the windshield is black, painted with stars, going on forever and ever and Bones' breath is hot against Jim's neck while his fingers are speeding up, going faster and doing clever twisty things that feels amazing.

Jim leans back into Bones' shoulder, hears the muttered "...infuriating, irresponsible..." and just has to turn his head and press his lips against Bones' throat, feel his pulse through the thin skin there, and when he comes it's with a soft exhalation as the stars burst behind his eyelids.


My brain is a puddle of happy happy blissful goo. This whole fic is so sexy and snarky and sweet at the same time! Your Bones voice is excellent.

Ok, I wasn't going to do this... BUT I OFFER YOU BRIBES OF SOME VARIETY IN EXCHANGE FOR MOAR. Plz?

(no subject)

Date: 2009-05-16 02:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zinfic.livejournal.com
Zin's ego says 'thank you' ;D
I think it's safe to say that there will be more. I'm falling in love with these characters all over again!

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