![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
zinnithOkay, this entry is sort of personal, but I'm going to make it public anyway. If you don't want to know very private things about me and my pet depression, the black beast, don't read.
Anyway, apparently the Swedish National Board for Health and Welfare wants Cognitive behavioural therapy to replace medication for patients with depression and anxiety-related illnesses.
It seems like the reason for this is that the current guidelines for depression and anxiety disorders are to prescribe medication. Not all patients are offered the choice of CBT, a treatment that doesn't have the side effects the medication can have.
Sure, it sounds like a good idea. I'm definitely not opposed to the idea of therapy. Therapy rules, and I know from personal experience that it can be very helpful as a tool when dealing with your emotional problems. What I am opposed to is the idea of changing the guidelines to consistently prescribing therapy instead of meds.
I can say without a doubt, and without being overly dramatic, that SSRI saved my life. Twice.
I have a long history of depression and dysthymia, and in the past five years, I've had three really rough periods. The first time, the Student Health sent me to a CBT therapist, and you know what? It didn't help me at all.
Don't get me wrong here - I'm not saying that CBT doesn't work. I know it does. I'm saying that, and this goes for all forms of therapy, in order for it to work, the patient must have the will and the energy that is neccessary to actually get something out of the therapy. At that point of my life, I didn't have that energy. I also didn't click at all with the therapist. I interpreted CBT to mean that 'If you pretend that you're not depressed, you won't be', and she did not correct me.
Do I have to say that I'm very good at pretending that everything is fine? Two months later, the therapist thought I had made excellent progress and declared me 'cured'. I was definitely not cured, but I had perfected my acting skills so I could at least make people believe I was healthy.
Two years later, I just couldn't keep up that appearence any more. I had a breakdown at work, passed out in the middle of a meeting and just sat there shaking until the ambulance came.
This was the first time I got a prescription for SSRI (Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors). And I won't lie, the first few weeks were filled with hellish side-effects and all sort of weird tics, but in the long run, it helped. That was probably the first time since I was seventeen that I actually looked forward to waking up in the morning.
To make a long story short, I felt better, stopped taking the meds, only to get worse again about a year later when I was working at the soul-killing dungeon of doom. This time however, I recognised the signs in time to prevent another breakdown and went looking for help in time. Again, SSRI, in combination with some major life adjustments, (i.e. quitting the damn job and moving closer to my family) helped me get my wonky brain chemistry under control.
Both times, I was offered therapy in combination with the meds. The first time I declined, because I really didn't believe it would do me any good. The second time, I waited until the meds had had some time to start working and then went to a few sessions with a therapist. We agreed that I already knew how to get my life back on track, all I needed was to not feel like shit anymore so I could find the energy to start working on getting better.
And that's my whole point, actually.
When you're so deep down in that black hole that you spend hours staring at your wrists thinking about razor blades, or find yourself with urges to step out in front of moving cars, or research lethal doses of various chemicals online, therapy shouldn't be the first choice. At that point, therapy is useless at best, and downright counter-productive at worst. When you can't even find the energy to get out of bed in the morning, you do not need to be told that you have the power over your own emotions. That will just make you feel worse, because hey, apparently it's your own fault that you're feeling like this and you're a big fat failure!
On a different note, I hate the use of the word 'happy pills' That implies that medication is some kind of magic solution, that once you start eating them you automatically get well. That's not true. Recovering from depression is hard work and it takes a long time. Therapy can certainly be a big help, but therapy is hard work too, and for it to do any good, you need to have the energy to do that work.
It's my firm belief that the best way to treat depression and anxiety disorders is medication and therapy in combination, not just one or the other. You can't put these illnesses into neat little boxes. Every patient is different and has different needs, and it's important that the doctor takes the time to look at each individual case to determine what the best treatment will be for the specific patient. If I had been sent directly to therapy again without any meds to help, I'm pretty sure I would not be alive today.
Okay, I was so not planning to write this entry, but the news just pissed me off. WTF desk monkeys? It's not that simple! Come back when you've actually had the illness in question!
(On an even more personal note - feeling fine now! For real! I'm finally off the meds and everything!)
Anyway, apparently the Swedish National Board for Health and Welfare wants Cognitive behavioural therapy to replace medication for patients with depression and anxiety-related illnesses.
It seems like the reason for this is that the current guidelines for depression and anxiety disorders are to prescribe medication. Not all patients are offered the choice of CBT, a treatment that doesn't have the side effects the medication can have.
Sure, it sounds like a good idea. I'm definitely not opposed to the idea of therapy. Therapy rules, and I know from personal experience that it can be very helpful as a tool when dealing with your emotional problems. What I am opposed to is the idea of changing the guidelines to consistently prescribing therapy instead of meds.
I can say without a doubt, and without being overly dramatic, that SSRI saved my life. Twice.
I have a long history of depression and dysthymia, and in the past five years, I've had three really rough periods. The first time, the Student Health sent me to a CBT therapist, and you know what? It didn't help me at all.
Don't get me wrong here - I'm not saying that CBT doesn't work. I know it does. I'm saying that, and this goes for all forms of therapy, in order for it to work, the patient must have the will and the energy that is neccessary to actually get something out of the therapy. At that point of my life, I didn't have that energy. I also didn't click at all with the therapist. I interpreted CBT to mean that 'If you pretend that you're not depressed, you won't be', and she did not correct me.
Do I have to say that I'm very good at pretending that everything is fine? Two months later, the therapist thought I had made excellent progress and declared me 'cured'. I was definitely not cured, but I had perfected my acting skills so I could at least make people believe I was healthy.
Two years later, I just couldn't keep up that appearence any more. I had a breakdown at work, passed out in the middle of a meeting and just sat there shaking until the ambulance came.
This was the first time I got a prescription for SSRI (Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors). And I won't lie, the first few weeks were filled with hellish side-effects and all sort of weird tics, but in the long run, it helped. That was probably the first time since I was seventeen that I actually looked forward to waking up in the morning.
To make a long story short, I felt better, stopped taking the meds, only to get worse again about a year later when I was working at the soul-killing dungeon of doom. This time however, I recognised the signs in time to prevent another breakdown and went looking for help in time. Again, SSRI, in combination with some major life adjustments, (i.e. quitting the damn job and moving closer to my family) helped me get my wonky brain chemistry under control.
Both times, I was offered therapy in combination with the meds. The first time I declined, because I really didn't believe it would do me any good. The second time, I waited until the meds had had some time to start working and then went to a few sessions with a therapist. We agreed that I already knew how to get my life back on track, all I needed was to not feel like shit anymore so I could find the energy to start working on getting better.
And that's my whole point, actually.
When you're so deep down in that black hole that you spend hours staring at your wrists thinking about razor blades, or find yourself with urges to step out in front of moving cars, or research lethal doses of various chemicals online, therapy shouldn't be the first choice. At that point, therapy is useless at best, and downright counter-productive at worst. When you can't even find the energy to get out of bed in the morning, you do not need to be told that you have the power over your own emotions. That will just make you feel worse, because hey, apparently it's your own fault that you're feeling like this and you're a big fat failure!
On a different note, I hate the use of the word 'happy pills' That implies that medication is some kind of magic solution, that once you start eating them you automatically get well. That's not true. Recovering from depression is hard work and it takes a long time. Therapy can certainly be a big help, but therapy is hard work too, and for it to do any good, you need to have the energy to do that work.
It's my firm belief that the best way to treat depression and anxiety disorders is medication and therapy in combination, not just one or the other. You can't put these illnesses into neat little boxes. Every patient is different and has different needs, and it's important that the doctor takes the time to look at each individual case to determine what the best treatment will be for the specific patient. If I had been sent directly to therapy again without any meds to help, I'm pretty sure I would not be alive today.
Okay, I was so not planning to write this entry, but the news just pissed me off. WTF desk monkeys? It's not that simple! Come back when you've actually had the illness in question!
(On an even more personal note - feeling fine now! For real! I'm finally off the meds and everything!)
