zinnith: (Default)
zinnith ([personal profile] zinnith) wrote2009-01-27 08:49 pm

An oldie but a goodie!

I'm bored and in the mood for procrastination. Here, have a Stupid Customer of the Day from my time at the Dungeon of Doom.

Me: Welcome to (satellite company) how can I help you?

Customer: Hi, I'm just calling to let you know that your satellite must've moved. Can you fix that as soon as possible please?

Me: Um... what makes you think the satellite moved?

Customer: My picture's all grainy and I lost a few channels. Can you just bump it back into place or something?

Me: I'm afraid that won't be possible. You will need to adjust your satellite dish to get the signal back. I can give you instructions for how to do it yourself, or we can send a technician within 24 hours.

Customer: No, no, there's nothing wrong with my dish, it's been in the same place for seven months.

Me: (knowing that there's been bad weather in his part of the country) Sir, is it windy where you are right now?

Customer: Yes, it's a bit of a storm actually. Now, are you going to move the satellite back or do I have to take this higher up?

Me: Sir, the satellite is in space. It didn't move. If you wait until the storm is over and then adjust your dish, the picture will come back.

Customer: You've been very unhelpful. Get your manager to call me back, I want to place a complaint. *click*

[identity profile] vaginasaurus.livejournal.com 2009-01-27 10:28 pm (UTC)(link)
Porn van? I'm intrigued!

[identity profile] zinfic.livejournal.com 2009-01-28 08:27 am (UTC)(link)
Heh...well once upon a time, the company I worked for broadcasted from England and due to some law or another, they weren't allowed to broadcast porn. So whenever the time came for the 'adult entertainment' they had to take out this old van, drive out in the middle of a field and flip a switch and voila - porn on TV!